Article: I Do’s do change EVERY thing.
So you are engaged, or contemplating engagement, and you are one of those people that believe that nothing is going to change after you say your vows- so then why do any thing? Maybe you have been living together, maybe you even have children already, maybe you two have known each other for what seems like forever and you cant imagine anything bringing you closer than you already are to one another..
Well let me tell you from both a professional aspect and a personal one, it does change!
Now you are no longer just a girlfriend or boyfriend or fiance… you are a spouse. The vows arent just words, its not just a party.. its a commitment.. a bond.. a responsibility to eachother- to be there, to care, to honor and respect in good times and in bad times. And trust me those bad times happen. With a simple phrase you become entrusted with your spouse’s well being and vice versa.
This may seem like a lot but if you are ready this added level of commitment and responsibility should be welcomed. If you are sweating right now just reading this, maybe you should take a breath and think if you are really ready.
In this country the divorce rates are outstanding, couples are turning to open relationships just to seek passion, and married people are getting the reputation of being unhappy. The best way to go into marriage is with open arms and an open heart.
One way to accomplish this is to set out your expectations and beliefs of what marriage is and what the future may bring. Take inventory of both sides and see what compromises need to be made and if they realistically can be met. Make a couples contract- write down what you both agree on. Make sure you cover all the areas that are important to both of you. Take this seriously as this will eliminate some of the surprises down the road. Things can always change but at least you will have created a foundation of beliefs that your new family can build upon.
Try to allow this process is to be a fun interactive one. If it starts an argument move on and come back to it later when you both have cooled down.
Remember wedding vows are a contract. Do not enter into it lightly. Go forth with full meaning of every word you say. Do not take that day for granted.
*For more information on how to prepare for your upcoming nuptials check out our Marital Preparation Course.
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